Disclaimer, disclaimer, disclaimer… Okay now I’ll begin lol.
Marriage by ancient belief is the joining of two people, energies, communities, families or clans for MUTUAL benefit. It is spiritual and loving. It is the responsibility of those IN the marriage and AROUND the marriage to keep it healthy, divine, loving and spiritual. Your mate(s) is/are supposed to help you in your continual growth and development. Marriage is not stagnant. It grows and changes with those involved.
Although I could talk for hours on this I’m going to try to do the (nutshell) version
*Deep Breath* Sounds simple right? It’s not! Not now because many of us have: Lost our connections to the Creator, Forgotten how to love naturally and wholistically, Not learned how to be in a relationship or sustain one, Accepted limiting views and “morals” about love, relationships and gender roles, accepted that there is "owership" in relationships, Etc, etc, etc.
But let’s get to the basics
Limiting love?. If you have an “infinite” amount of love for children, family members, friends, animals, plants, colors… Why can you only have enough love or attraction for ONE mate? Sounds hypocritical and unreasonable to me... Why is your love limited in only this one capacity? You are never told you only have enough love for one child or one best friend. BUT relationships are a COMPLETELY different ballgame? I can only be straight, gay, bi, or some other limiting “label” You see my point here? We are not allow to love who, what, how or why we love naturally. We have to limit our show of attraction and expressions of love.
Now just like with the number of children, best friends, pets you decide to love and cherish it is the same. Don’t have two children if you can not love, honor, cherish and take care of them EQUALLY, same with relationships. If your relationships can not be sustained and propagated in a healthy and spiritually sound manner than it should not be pursued…PERIOD. It is unhealthy to involve yourself with any and everything that attracts you. Try not to be gluttonous are a wet noodle!! Have control and high standards.
Communal responsibility: It takes a village to raise a child AND keep a marriage strong. Marriages need support! It is a constant journey or be completely separate and completely joined (I’ll give you a minute).
When people come to the wedding they are agreeing to help the coupling stay together and strong. That is why it is asked if anyone objections, because you are there agreeing to support them in this journey. Traditionally if there was a problem in the marriage everyone and anyone who could help was brought in along with diviners and ancestors. It was personal and not! The belief was that if one person had a problem the entire society had a problem and it was treated as such. People did not have to hide or be ashamed of their issues. They were handled and solved together. So it made them stronger and healthier.
Spiritual: When I say marriage was spiritual I mean that the greater good is always considered and put at the forefront. People came together based on more than just physical attraction. It was about what was needed for those involved and the community.
What energies needed to be together? Who fits well? Who would bring joy, light and growth to one another? Women you have to consider: What am I letting into my body, mind, spirit, future and what is it going to leave behind inside of me, Men you have to consider: What am I surrounding my body, mind, spirit future with and what am I leaving behind of myself. I hope I’m not losing you.
Let me not get to deep on y’all but you get my point.
Marriage is wonderful if it is taken back to the origins and divine understanding.
PLEASE PLEASE COMMENT AND SHARE YOUR VIEWS.
7 comments:
Brilliant! This helps me see why Taurus wouldn't have worked, based on THIS quote: "If your relationships can not be sustained and propagated in a healthy and spiritually sound manner than it should not be pursued…PERIOD. It is unhealthy to involve yourself with any and everything that attracts you."
Even though he and I were not in a relationship, I was not respected in the realm of communication or time. It wasn't healthy, although it could have been potentially (if he'd forgive). Can't live life based on potential!! This has helped me so much!
I think that it is pretty well known that I am Not to date a supporter of marriage (more specifically, marriage in its/our current state). I don't believe in the institution, and I most certainly do not believe that what it stood for in earnest once is what it stands for, now.
Now yes, I do See where you are coming from - I too share the view that profound love should be expressed towards all relationships (All: Lovers, Enemies, Nature, Meals), and that means wholesome compassion and understanding. An eagerness to See their view. But I don't See the assertion that that should then apply to mean Selfless Devotion to any one character in your life. I don't See that that should mean I keep another soul from their Way just because we are bound together in matrimony. I don't See that if the Season for the person I've loved is expiring, that against all Will of the Universe, I shall fight to maintain what I consider tantamount to stagnation..
In regards to communal responsibility, I again am also of such a Sight - it does indeed take a village. But things have changed (as they will, and shall forever). The world has both grown smaller and more populated. Faster. And no longer is the village our village, but the World's our village. For all the good and all the bad that entails. And perhaps you should have close friends to help see you through your troubles, but seldom are we so fortunate, and when there Are those so indeed blessed, you must too be Aware of to what ends or perspective gains these friends or family members offer such assistance.
I Trust in change. I therefor have faith in Seasons. I will eagerly spend all of my days with a single heart if such is my destiny. I may spend a lifetime dancing between seasons and beautiful hearts that love me as I love them - Not romantically but wholly, profoundly, otherworldly - for as long as their individual Seasons last.. I resolve to maintain the sanctity of our Connection, our relationship, our Bond by Love and Truth.. I do not think that that is made worse without the ring and contractual obligations. I don't think that that is made better with such things, either.
The times have Changed, and marriage has lost its very light and soul to the letter.
In my view..
Mucho Love, dear heart :)
Cory
Thanks for your comments. Cory I agree with some of your thoughts. Marriage has been bastardized in many ways. However just like the others these we fight against we must too redefine marriage for ourselves and our youth. I have been married for five years and we have had our struggles. However I look at relationships around us and see the difference it makes to have a supportive family and using our ancient pratices. Relationships or not without strife that is the nature of growth. Today people take the spirit out of almost everything and so it causes many issues. I believe marriage is what the 2,3,4,8, etc. people involved in it make it.
Marriage is a partnership for mutual benefit. So if it is not beneficial to all involved it is not a marriage. Plus there is not ownership involved you have to do what feels right for your spirit and your health.
I could go on forever... Marriage is a good thing and comes in many forms. But only you and the creator know if that would add in you manifesting what YOU came to be. It may or may not.
Peace and love
As always I enjoy our dance
*looks for borntomotivate*
My Loves, My Loves!!!! Apologies to the Beautiful Gods on this thread, for my delay in the sharing of the minds. Obtundant duty calls and I must answer accordingly (for now) ....
Marriage ! I have never contemplated something so heavily in my life, than this subject, because, well... I am devoting my LIFE to it. When I think of the Union, I think of spirits intertwining and loosely locking with one another. Loosely, as to allow room for each other to grow into new beings, that can then re-twine and keep the synchronous flow alive. I do not see Marriage as a stagnate body or a even a state of permanence. I see it as an evolutionary tool that can give birth to new purpose, physically and spiritually. As a budding teenager, I prayed about marriage, in wonders of what it would be like and if it would happen for me. The response I got was that my true and utter purpose would fulfilled once I was in a state of marriage b/c that connection with another human life and the stability of that union will anchor me long enough for me to give birth to my passion and my service for humanity.
I believe that focusing my spirit with the spirit of my husband will allow me to grow, manifest, and become everything I want and need to be. I do believe that this state is not required for ALL people to be extremely fulfilled in every aspect of life. However, for me, I know this is my journey. I am excited about the fruits that will be born from this journey.
I do understand Coreman's views, however. I, too, believe in the seasons. For what happens in the physical also happens in the spiritual. However, the same way the seasons change, but we can always look up to the same sky, I know the seasons will change in my marriage, and I will be able to look over to the same man, and know that we've travailed and prevailed together.
Love you all :)
I'm commenting again, here, as to permit me responding to the both of you. Naturally this is a topic that has firm basis in belief so I don't really want to accidentally go too far and offend my dear sweethearts - so please bare with me as I try to find the right words for my View. :)
I again find it to be such a beautiful thing that there are people that believe in the institution as more than what scrappish remnants of it that remain to this day. If to you this bond in matrimony is a spiritual one, then who am I to say what it means to me should apply to you? No one, put simply and honestly, and I would never aim to push my views to suggest that they should Too be Your views.
As marriage is to Me, however, means nothing. The institution isn't worth fighting for to me as it seems to be a regressing step in human nature - that which in any right denies Freedom, to me, is False. Not to suggest that I'm of the mind that people should go about gallivanting along with multiple partners at his/her whim - not at all. I'm loyal to women who have my heart, and such disloyalty is weakness of Ego and proof of a false love in my view. But when it comes to the point where someone suggests that a contract, the threat of "half", a material ring, or how family, friends, or any other peripheral (however close the relation, they too are External) entity might view you or your decisions as the only reason(s) why you are with someone who you are miserable with, it breaks my heart. For just as with Anything that Forces some (+) ideal on someone, it defeats its very purpose.
Marriage Does become a matter of ownership, not partnership (to some). Marriage does become a matter of stagnation of spiritual growth and Self evolution (for others), and often does it too become a matter of obligations to Expectations (matters of the Ego) before acknowledgement of the mutual and simpatico spirit.
Not suggesting that fear of such things should be reason not to marry - I'm just suggesting that if these are things that come of marriage these days (more so because in these times people have lost love and respect for Self and thus expect it to be fed them via their betrothed), then something is wrong with the institution. Or perhaps with the people involved. Or the common (mis/pre)conception of what a marriage should in fact be. I know of more women in my age group with this Expectation that marriage is wholly akin to Disney fodder of the Cinderella and Beauty & the Beast and Little Mermaid brands. I don't think it is. And if this is the common current view of marriage and love in general then I feel that ought be addressed Before seeking another's hand.
I find evolution lies in the connections with all man-kind.. Perhaps I will find someone to grow in all ways for all days with. But that is no reason to deny myself all the rest of the world, lo, the Universe, even, in the whole of my expansion. In fact to do so would be to deny my Self a Universe x A Lifetime of essential mirrors. While I cannot say that marriage Will in fact do this, the everyday concept of what it is, Now, will surely make it more likely, due to what I see as a false (and cruel) sense of entitlement/ownership, the failings and indoctrinations of the ego (jealousy, envy, rage), and such lacking in Self Love that my own Love (normally expansive, whole, and overflowing) now need to be directed, singular, and painfully stilted..
To practice Love, Loyalty, Honor and Reverence, and to practice Respect for your Own needs And your partners -To be utterly and wholly compassionate- None of these things are understandings or abilities kept by a ring or marriage, and as such Love is all I believe in, I don't feel inclined to introduce unto my existence yet another tether to the past and grounding from our rightful place in the Free Skies..
Cory, I totally understand where you're coming from because I, too, faced the dilemma of my internal feelings toward the "institution of marriage" and my desire to be with my fiance' for the rest of my life. It felt unfair that someone somewhere, that I never met, could determine the "rules" of marriage, and that I would have to play by them. I have never colored inside the lines, so why must I start now?? However, the conclusion to which I came is that I can make up my own rules to the way I want to go about this. My partner and I can find a happy medium that satisfies our soul's needs, our physical desires, and our spiritual longing for one another - on our own terms. A lot of people catch flack for being in an open marriage, or for being in a polyamorous relationship. I'm not saying that I am in either of those types of relationships, because I am not. However, I, too, have been accused of being unconventional some of my beliefs and practices. That's fine by me b/c whoever came up with "convention" can hopefully live by it comfortably. As for me and my house?? We'll make up our own rules, draw our own lines, and color inside or outside of them! Whatever suits us! That is the way WE do marriage.
That's just like I can't fault Erykah Badu's views. To her, whomever she is loving at the time IS her partner and is whom she chooses to bring a life into this world with. and that's BEAUTIFUL to me! That's how I feel about your views, as well. Because they suit you and your spirit, they're beautiful. I just pray that we can all stay in touch with ourselves and our inner voices. The TRUTH in all of this discussion lies within, for each of us. May we come to our own truths, and be ever true to them! Love y'all!
Hello everyone. Marriage is truly a sacrificial commitment between you and one person. You are sacrificing SELF as one to be completed as two (SELF(s)) together making a complete one. It is a serious commitment and sometimes mistakenly taken on by people just on the basis of love. Love is only one aspect of marriage. There are thousands of divorced people who still love each other. "What love got to do with it!" Although, it plays a huge part, just loving somebody does not mean that you are spiritually connected. I have yet to find that person and have not given up that desire to meet that person. I am also selfish to the fact that I did not want to be completed with another person. Please do not go in to marriage with the thought that you will stay the same. It will not last. On the surface you are the same but you now have that person(s) spirit within you. So SHARING AND CARING goes along with good SEX and FINANCIAL stability. Don't forget COMMUNICATION is the KEY! Well, I'll leave you with that thought for now.
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